It’s horrible!!! I was talking to Fewena from the Jupiter. She says The Jackass want to install an air-conditioner on the sun and build his HQ there! This guy is officially a crazy. He says the Mars should be wiped off the universe! He charges the guerrillas on the Uranus to loot our properties there! We use the Uranus as our warehouse.
Humina! my poor cosine; he was there last week! He used to collect emeralds from all around the solar system! He was only 347 years old and had plans to get married with Skewna the daughter of Maosta head of Tharsis region. Were they immortal lovers! We found her body in the valley of Valles Marineris in an emerald field, where her roboslave was covering her body with emeralds, now radiating a strange red light! I could not stop crying. Again I shed green tears.
The first time I shed those mysterious tears, was at my father’s funeral. I cried from 25:341 in the morning to 64:235 at night! My eyes were all green; I could hardly see the red fog of solar radiation in the horizon! It was there that I swore that I take revenge on the jackass. Then I took the XC00 and go for a ride with Looliak, my witty sweet girlfriend. It’s a pity that she’s going to the Uranus to complete her studies on warehousing… or maybe on no-warehousing!
I am working on a new spacecraft. It is totally different from the XC00. We actually made it for our holidays riding when we used to go to Saturn. I had designed a sound system on XC00. We rocked the universe.
Fewena promised to provide us with solar-shields, grey-fart bombs and inter-galaxy ballistics. Yeah, we are getting ready. Jupiter aliens fart in grey when they eat some kind of potato grows on one of the Galilean satellites: Ganymede and this is the largest moon in the solar system- even larger than Mercury (In the mediaeval age, Mercury aliens once tried to destroy it with nuclear attack. But as their spacecraft was built and used in the high temperature of mercury (467 degrees Celsius), they became brittle in the cold weather of Ganymede and could easily be broken. They lost the war! Some survivors settled down in Callisto, the other satellite of Jupiter).
They manufacture some kinda bombs with their grey farts. When explode, a grey-fart bomb provides a stinky cloud!
I asked her for some of those cookies her grandma cooks. Once you try it, you will fart in blue unconsciously for a few couple of days, 68/7! You become actually handicapped for the next few days, as you can not see anything in that blue cloud you made, and can not hear anything else but the sound of your own nonstop blasts of fart! First time I had eaten one of those cookies, a Meteoroid big enough to make a marsquack of 6 on the Richter scale fell into our marsberry field and I did not feel anything until I got rid of those farts! Even my mother thought that it was me!! Although we can not digest it well, Jupiter guys love it. They have a different digestive system, and that’s because those mushrooms only grow on the Jupiter. Over ages, it has strengthened their digestion. Anyway, I never told Fewena the truth about those cookies, she thinks I really love them! But I use them as a weapon against the jackass! His people got a poor digestion. They may even die of those grandma cookies!
The plan is that our spy in their army, Felander, should spread the cookies in their independence day celebration; once the cookies affect, we start our attack with grey-fart bombs which will be attached on inter-galaxy ballistic heads, we should lunch them 34 days in advance; they will arrive the HQ on time. There will be no guard!
The Jackass men will face their destiny soon…
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